MÈRE Stories: Krista King
I stepped into this motherhood journey overnight.
I got married and took on my husband's 4 little daughters.
They all moved into my house and all of a sudden my life changed.
My mornings became busy, packing lunches and cooking breakfast, scrambling to get the kids to school on time.
My evenings were booked giving baths and telling stories. I went from cooking for one to cooking for six, three times a day. And don't even get me started on the never-ending piles of laundry.
The work you do often feels invisible. Being a stepmom is a beautiful gift—to love these children by choice.
But it can also be lonely—you’re not really a mom so you don't get the name, people love to remind you that you're not their mother. My kids yell “Krista, look!!” at the store or the playground and other moms assume I am the babysitter.
I can’t quite relate to my friends who have kids of their own and my friends who do not can’t always see how my life has changed all that much.
Parenting a ten year old while also learning how to live together for the first time and understand each other—now that is not an easy task.
I wish I had given us more grace.
If you had to summarize your journey in motherhood with all its challenges, how would you describe it now? How have you found a way to reclaim your strength or identity? What have you learned?If I had to summarize my journey into motherhood it would be like a diving.
I didn't just slowly step in—I dove straight into the deep end. I am still in the process of learning how to live this self-sacrificial life of a mother while keeping my peace and the identity I had before they came into my life.
It’s so easy to lose yourself as a mom, your days are no longer your own and these little humans become your world. Your Saturdays are suddenly full of soccer games instead of beach days. I’m learning to be present. I’m learning to let others help.
If becoming a mom to four overnight taught me anything its that I can’t do everything. Over time, I’ve learned to slow down even when life feels like it’s constantly moving forward at full speed.
What advice or words of encouragement would you give another mom walking through a similar chapter? If you are walking through the journey of step-motherhood, I would encourage you to find other moms in a similar situation.
Remind yourself you're not alone.
And don't stop taking care of yourself. Ask for help, take the time to be with friends. Love them fully and unconditionally even if you'll always be second or third—the love you give will last for generations.
How has your journey changed you, both in ways you expected and in ways you never could have imagined?This journey has changed me in a lot of ways. I’ve learned so much about my strengths and weaknesses.
I’ve somehow become more humble and proud of myself at the same time.
— Krista King
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